I've always been fascinated with homelessness. I always wondered how a person could go from a beautiful baby that people travel far and wide to see, to a person with no family. It didn't make sense to me. I thought, where did everyone go? Why did everyone leave? Could this person not possibly have anyone they could call? Is it because of untreated mental illness? Do they really need only one dollar? Why isn't anyone doing something to put an end to homelessness? I had so many questions.
According to the Coalition for the Homeless, there are close to 62,000 homeless people living in NYC. In that number there are close to 15,000 families, and 22,000 children living in shelters.
In the Fall of 2016, I had an opportunity to join a team at my church that goes out into the streets on Wednesday nights. This team, affectionately called Street Teams, focuses on loving and caring for our friends on the street, the homeless. What I liked most about the team was that the goal was and is to treat our friends on the street with dignity, to see and hear them. Most service-based initiatives tend to speak before listening, pushing services, and not building genuine connections with the people in need.
Street Teams met after our Wednesday night service, around 8:30pm. Our amazing leaders would prepare us and lead us week after week. We would gather together, pray, divide up clothing donations and/or toiletries, break up into teams, and were given specific instructions on which route to walk. A team would consist of two captains and 4-5 people like myself who just wanted to help. Breaking up in teams and specific routes allowed us to connect with each other, and whoever we were going to meet that night. It also allowed us as a team and church to reach more people across the vast NYC streets.
I was a member of that team for a little over a year and I didn't miss a single Wednesday night out. In that time I met some of the most incredible people.
With that being said, there's absolutely nothing glamorous about homeless outreach. But there is something special about meeting people where they are and not allowing their circumstances to hinder the conversation.
Often in the dark, our friends on the street are afraid to engage us because they get mistreated by everyone. People watching us talk to our friends on the street look at us with disgust. There is no spotlight recognition. No cameras. You brave the elements extreme heat or cold. You often leave an encounter encouraged but still with the tension of wondering how this problem could go on for so long and no one seems to care.
One particular story always stands out to me. I was near Union Square walking with our team and we spotted a group of homeless people living together in community. The surprising thing about this community is that none of them looked over 25. Now I was really confused. Why? Because up until this point, the face of homelessness seemed to be predominantly older men & women. Not kids and/or young adults. However, I also thought seeing them altogether was beautiful despite the drug use. I had never seen a community of homeless people. It's usually one person by them self. They were all smiles whether they were smiling through the pain or genuinely just happy, they were smiling.
Note: You've probably walked by tons of homeless people and thought they were only asking for money to use drugs, or you may have noticed that many of them were either on drugs and/or drunk. Consider for a moment all of the things you need in order to get a good nights rest, then think of finding a place to sleep on a sidewalk without the amenities. Consider what it might mean to use the bathroom on yourself for days, and because of the smell, people look at you with disgust in addition to how you may already look at yourself. We all battle those inner voices. I'm not advocating for drug use, but I am saying, think of what you are currently doing to ease your pain and/or what would you do to ease that pain. Is it healthy or harmful? Either way, you can never go wrong with thinking compassion and empathy first.
We still went up to them. We said, "Hey, how are you guys doing tonight? We are giving away clothes and toiletries. Could any of you use this stuff?" They asked, "Who are ya'll and why are you doing this?" We said "We represent a team at our church that goes out into the streets and looks for people to love and help where we can."
We talked with them for over an hour, and it was freezing. I met a guy named Ray who loved to do Joker impressions from the movie The Dark Knight Rises. It was funny the first time, not so much the fifth time around. (I only thought this I didn't actually say this.) Ray was 26 at the time, he had a five year old son and had fallen on hard times after an accident. He and I bonded and exchanged numbers, and he asked me to come pick him up for church on Sunday.
I headed over there on Sunday and the scene was brutal. All of them that were in community together on Wednesday were all throwing up. He told me he couldn't make it to church that day and asked me if I would mind picking them up some Pepto Bismal. I got it for them and left. I checked on him periodically throughout the week and he said again, “Come get me for Church on Sunday.” Sunday rolls around again and I head over to his spot near Union Square. When I arrive, he again says, “Not today.” I said, “No problem.”
I keep in contact with him throughout the next week and again he says, “I want to go to church on Sunday.” The next Sunday I go to pick him up, and this time he was ready to go. I was shocked. He went on to go with me two weeks straight, and then not again for an entire year. Nevertheless, I still went to check on him weekly and he would share with me his progress on getting housing and getting his life back together, which included seeing his son. After all, the goal was never to get him to church. The goal was just to be a friend. We lost contact for a month because his phone broke. He reached back out to me to tell me that he was no longer homeless. He got an apartment in Brooklyn and that in a few more weeks he would like to have me over for dinner.